Pain
by SkywardShadow
Summary: -"Pain means different things to different people." Depressing little twoshot on the Uchiha brothers. Completed at last.
1. Uchiha Itachi

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. If I did, Itachi would still be alive.

**A/N: Dedicated to all the fans of Itachi, Sasuke, and Mikoto. **

–**inner struggle- …Okay; to all the fans of Fugaku, too. (Sorry; I just don't like him..)**

**x-x-x-x-x-x-x**

**Pain: Uchiha Itachi**

**x-x-x-x-x-x-x**

_Six Years Ago_

"Itachi! W-what are you doing?!"

It's the first time he's ever heard anything remotely resembling fear in his father's voice. His mother enters the room, a crease in her face showing her worry. "What's going-Itachi? What's wrong?"

Her tone is so sweet, so loving, so _motherly_.

_God, why do I have to do this?!_

He forces himself to remember the mission. If an uprising takes place, another Ninja War could very well follow. Logically, what's worth more-the lives of an entire small clan, or the lives of millions of innocents that could be lost in a full-scale war?

That's what the elders had pounded into his head. He had made it his reality, his truth. If he didn't, then he could never carry out his duty.

He had known since he was old enough to understand the word 'death' that he would one day become a shinobi. And as a shinobi, he would probably kill many people. He had accepted that. Each mission was like a small war; enemies had to die or _he_ would. It was just a fact of life.

But he had never thought that one day, the enemies he had to kill would be his own family.

Never mind what had happened to _Shisui_. He could never forget that.

He swallows hard. He can't show his emotions. He needs to shut them away; lock them in a box and destroy the key. He'll never get through this if he allows memories or love interfere with his duty.

"You planned a revolt against the elders of Konohagakure," he says in a surprisingly cool-sounding voice. He's been reciting these words in his head for weeks. "The ANBU and the elders have caught on to you."

"Dear?" Mikoto asks, confused, turning to her white-faced husband. The older man shakes his head nervously. Mikoto's eyebrows crinkle together as she worriedly pieces the puzzle together.

Horrified understanding plays across her face. "Uchiha Fugaku," she chokes out in a tortured tone. "You did _not_." Nobody answers her. A small moan escapes her lips, and she sinks to the floor in shock.

The prodigy continues. "They have decided that you are too dangerous to be left alive. Your execution will be carried out immediately."

Mikoto is shaking her head frantically, raven-blue hair whipping back and forth. She says without words, _No. No, this can't be true. There is some mistake._

_I'm sorry, Mother. I wish it was a mistake._

Fukagu's expression is unreadable. "And the executioner?" he inquires numbly.

This is the moment he dreaded. "Me. Uchiha Itachi."

Mikoto cries out. Fugaku closes his eyes, because to show tears would be the utmost shame of a proud shinobi.

_Mother. Father. I'm so sorry…Please forgive me! I don't want to have to do this! I'm sorry!_

He can't say it aloud, and that kills him. Because they will never know.

Silence. Then, quick death. Swift, clean, and stealthy, as is the way of the ninja.

_Slice._

_Slice._

_I'm sorry._

_**I'M SORRY!!**_

In seconds, they are both dead. Gone forever. He has murdered his own parents.

He lays their bodies together, unable to deny them that one small kindness. Fugaku looks more at peace now than he ever did in life; in contrast, Mikoto's face speaks of a terrible nightmare that she prayed she would soon wake from. Sadness and weariness, shock that the bringer of death was her own son. Silent screams.

The inner agony is beyond anything he could have ever imagined.

_What have I done?!_

He can't linger, lost in that one thought. Because there are footsteps in the house. The final and worst part of his personal hell is rapidly approaching, by way of a small boy-one Uchiha Sasuke. The brother of a self-proclaimed demon.

_Oh, God…_

The door opens.

**x-x-x-x-x-x-x**

_Three Years Ago_

It's been a while since that fateful day when, at the tender age of thirteen, he slaughtered his own family and earned his beloved little brothers' everlasting hatred.

That brother stands before him once again, but this time, he's completely different. Full of hate, and burning to kill.

No, wait. He's not all that different. Still the same scared, miserable little boy. But those emotions are hidden beneath a thick mask of fury, fire and ice.

The 'fight' is brief. He has an easier time withholding his feelings now, after three years of practice. Still, with every hit he lands, every spurt of blood out of his precious brother's mouth…

_I'm sorry._

Over and over, he says it silently. Cries inside as he has done so many times before.

And when he uses Mangekyo Sharingan on Sasuke, replaying their clan's death-their _parent's_ death-well, that is excruciating.

When he and his companion retreat, old wounds return with a vengeance. Bleeding everywhere, but there's no sign of red. It hurts so bad.

But still..

"You okay?" Kisame asks with a hint of concern.

He is an Uchiha. He _will_ be strong. It's the only consolation he can offer his clan.

"I'm fine."

**x-x-x-x-x-x-x**

_Now_

At last, it's ending.

Blood is everywhere; no illusion this time. The fight, the hate, the path of revenge, the regret-all of it is about to come to an abrupt halt.

He uses the last of his strength to drag himself over to his brother. His vision is starting to fade out.

He raises two fingers and jabs the younger boy in the forehead. Just like the old days.

And, for the first time in so long, he musters up the most genuine smile he can. None of the bittersweet thoughts swirling around in his head make it into that beautiful smile.

_Sorry, Sasuke._

_There won't be a next time._

He falls.

**x-x-x-x-x-x-x**

Pain means different things to different people.

Having to kill your best friend, the person you loved.

Having to murder your own family in cold blood.

Having to torture your brother.

Watching that brother grow up wasting his life on hatred, never knowing that his aniki still cared deeply for him.

Not knowing what would happen next in Sasuke's miserable life, but knowing you wouldn't be there to help him.

For Uchiha Itachi, that was pain.

**Part One:**

**End**

**x-x-x-x-x-x-x**

**A/N:…Yikes. That was kind of…_bad_, wasn't it? Gomenasai…-.-;; **

**I'm still probably going to add a chapter on Sasuke, tho'. I hope.**

**Thanks for reading. -SS**


	2. Uchiha Sasuke

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. If I did, Madara would BURN!

**A/N: Domo arigato, everyone!! :D And gomen for the delay.**

**Part Two is dedicated to:**

**firefoxxe; thanks for Alerting!**

**devotedtodreams; thanks for reviewing and Favoriting!**

**hakuisagirl; thanks for reviewing!**

**Ninjashallow; thanks for Favoriting!**

**Hana-Tenshi, thanks for Alerting!**

**And to moonfairie; thanks for reviewing, Alerting and Favoriting!**

**You guys rock!! XD I hope you enjoy Part Two! –SS**

**x-x-x-x-x-x-x**

**Pain: Uchiha Sasuke**

**x-x-x-x-x-x-x**

_Seven Years Ago_

"…I should have known."

Four small words. Yet they hold so much power. The power to crush a young boy's spirit and any happy feelings in one second flat.

His father doesn't need to finish the sentence. Sasuke knows. He can think of a dozen different endings to it. He's heard them all, out loud or otherwise.

_I should have known that you couldn't do it._

_I should have known, because you aren't a prodigy like Itachi. You are nothing compared to Itachi._ Worthless.

_I should have known, because all you do is disappoint. _

_I should have known better than to put even a little faith in you._

_I should have known better than to wonder if you might actually make me proud._

The one that sums it all up-_I should have known better than to think you were worth anything._

He doesn't cry. To do so would only bring more weary, disappointed scorn. He does it silently, in the form of words that will never be spoken-_Why am I never as good as you expect me to be?! Why couldn't __**I**__ have been born the prodigy?! _

_Why can't you learn to just accept me for who I am?! _

_**I am not Itachi!**_

But his father can't seem to see that.

Even though Sasuke loves his brother immensely, he can't help but feel a twinge of resentment.

_Why did __**you**__ have to get all the smart genes, aniki?_

He watches his father walk away, leave him behind in more ways than one.

**x-x-x-x-x-x-x**

_Six Years Ago_

Maybe he's finally making progress? After all, Fugaku did teach him the Fireball Jutsu the other day.

Although a small, sensible part of him says that Fugaku only turned to his younger son because his eldest was acting strangely, the little raven pushes such thoughts away. He's happy to simply be acknowledged by his father, the one he wants to please above all others.

For once, he's feeling optimistic about his chances of becoming more than just a disappointment in his father's eyes.

_Maybe Itachi will train with me more if I get stronger,_ is more of his hopeful reasoning. _We could be the best ninja in Konoha, and Father would be proud of both of us!_

This cheering thought propels him back to the Uchiha compound, where he stops short.

The lights are all off.

_But…but why?_ he wonders. _It's too early for everyone to be sleeping..so what's…?_

Nervous, he walks through the gates and immediately wishes he hadn't.

The compound is a masterful mess. Flags are shredded, lanterns are broken, kunai and shuriken are protruding from various buildings, and blood is everywhere.

Scattered all over the ground at intervals are the bodies of Uchihas-his aunt and uncle, among others-all tossed aside carelessly like rag dolls that some sadistic child has tired of.

He stands in shock for a minute, then realizes that his parents must also be in danger. He runs to his house, but upon reaching the door is warned away by a yell of "Sasuke! Don't come in!"

It's the first-and last-time that Uchiha Fugaku has ever protected his younger son.

Seconds pass, and a scared-stiff Sasuke forces himself into the house.

Lying dead on the floor, slumped over each other and covered in blood, are his mother and father.

Faces devoid of emotion save for the dark and dull remnants of their last, all-too-real nightmare.

And standing over them with a bloody katana, eyes cold as ice, remorseless, is his beloved older brother.

_Itachi..? But.._

_**Why?!**_

The utter and total agony that follows doesn't answer his question. But the torturer isn't replying.

**x-x-x-x-x-x-x**

_Three Years Ago_

He still isn't strong enough.

_Why? I hate him with everything I have! Why can't I come close to his power?!_

The battle was painful-mentally _and_ physically-but more than that it was humiliating. This is proof of what he denied, but somehow knew-he is nowhere near Itachi. He never has been. Possibly he never will be. (Not that he'd ever admit that aloud.)

Even now, Uchiha Itachi, the prodigy, is number one. He is superior.

Sasuke is nothing.

He screams in frustration to a sky that can't listen.

**x-x-x-x-x-x-x**

_Two and a half years ago_

Decision made.

Emotions locked away.

Reputation sealed.

Naruto is injured, but still alive after their vicious fight. _I'll never be forgiven._

Sasuke tries to think impassively. So what if he is hated? _Hate makes you stronger._ That's why he joined the disgusting snake, Orochimaru. That's why he betrayed the only ones he had left. That's why he _will_ beat his brother.

He will beat him, even if he loses every limb and has to fight with his teeth.

No matter what. Death, injury, hurt-love-none of it will stop him from achieving his goal.

"Just wait, Itachi," he growls quietly. Predatory grace and soft bloodlust swirl in words part of him wishes he doesn't mean. "_You will pay for this_."

He will carry out the deserved sentence. Revenge for everything he has lost.

**x-x-x-x-x-x-x**

_In days recently passed_

_Who's number one now, brother._

It's not even a questioning mental tone. He doesn't have enough energy to inquire and wait for an answer. One that won't come. The prospect of one more question mark, after everything has been resolved, is just exhausting.

It's over. Finally. Finished. Done.

Uchiha Itachi is dead.

_An eye for an eye,_ is the grim thought. (The irony of that statement does not escape him.) _You killed our family, took everything from me. And now I have killed you. My duty as an avenger comes to a close._

Rain is pouring, like it did the day of the massacre, mixing with a young man's blood as his brother watches in weary, shocked silence. Dark eyes, blind and unseeing, stare at nothing as they are filled with the sky's justified tears.

The ghost of Itachi's last, nostalgic smile is faintly traced on his face.

Sasuke remembers that moment with a twinge of confusion. _Why did he poke my forehead and smile like that? Was he hoping I'd forgive him?!_

He looks off to the distance as an invisible soul wings away. _I'm strong enough now, brother_, he thinks, closing his tired and bloody eyes.

_I am finally strong enough._

He has fulfilled his purpose, his duty.

So he can't help but wonder why he's crying.

(There's no sign of tears, but he is crying.)

**x-x-x-x-x-x-x**

_Now_

The sea sparkles and laughs, making a mockery out of the ultimate misery of the young raven.

Madara has told him the truth about his brother.

Ignorance is bliss. Truth is painful.

For the second time in his short life, the only thing keeping Sasuke going is the addictive need for revenge.

This time, it's not so much intoxicating as it is a pure need to shed blood-not much of a difference, but he realizes now that the true enemy was always within reach. His aniki, his loving elder brother, had lived and died, always protecting him. Selflessly sacrificing his life, feelings and peace of mind to strengthen his little brother and keep him safe.

The waves move along lazily as exquisite agony riles up in the form of anguished thoughts. _Why did you have to die? Why did everything have to end so badly?_

_Itachi…big brother…_

Coherent thoughts are temporarily extinguished. All save for _Why?_

Everything is blocked, tuned out. For long minutes, nothing outside can reach him.

The other members of Hawk watch with silent sympathy as one of the last Uchihas bows his head and sobs.

Tears fall rapidly.

They won't stop.

**x-x-x-x-x-x-x**

Pain means different things to different people.

Knowing you were a disappointment, having it blatantly rubbed in, even though you were trying your hardest.

Losing your entire family at the hands of the person you idolized and loved.

Drifting impatiently through life with nothing, letting no one in, striving to get somewhere you could never reach.

Always failing, until you betrayed everyone and every bond to reach your goal.

Watching your brother die in his own blood before your eyes.

Remembering the days when you thought he would love you forever, protect you forever.

And then realizing you were right.

After it was far too late.

For Uchiha Sasuke, that is pain.

(And only time will tell if he ever heals.)

**Part Two:**

**End**

**x-x-x-x-x-x-x**

**A/N: Apparently my plot bunny was depressed. Gomen if it wasn't worth your time.**

**Reviews are always cherished, but feel no obligation.**

**Thanks a thousand times for reading this. **

**Sayonara.**

**-SkywardShadow**


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